A year without Steven

El Steven Mackin? Still close to our hearts. On October 16th, 2006, Steven was still sending me text message shout-outs from the University of Louisville cancer center in Kentucky to which I naturally replied "Love shout-outs from people I know with last name of Mackin!"

This, a couple of days after I spent a full afternoon texting back and forth with the main man as he was being transported in an ambulance from the smaller Vanderbilt Medical Center in Nashville to a larger cancer center at Louisville University (the transfer decision came at the last minute and left him without anyone to accompany him during the ambulance ride - I was more than glad to be there for him).

What can I say? I miss Steven. Lots. Today my I-Tunes player brought up the "Field of Dreams" theme song that Steven had sent me a while back when he wanted to share one of his favorite compositions (I mean, he was a college band dweeb and all). It really got me big time.

Throughout the year I have been in touch with his mom, Sheila, and his sisters, Torey and Amy Jo. On Sunday, October 28th, the anniversary of Steven's death, they will gather together with other family members at the cemetery where Steven is buried and hold balloons with notes to Steven attached to them. They will release the balloons around 2pm, which is the estimated time at which Steven died a year ago on the 28th. I will probably do the same at Central Park here in New York.

If you'd like to send greetings to the Mackin family I urge to write directly to Steven's mom at shebrady@hotmail.com (not sure she'll get back to you but I am certain she will appreciate your thoughts and greetings).

In the meantime Jake Wheat at StreetBlast.com has put together a music CD in honor of Steven to raise awareness about Ewing's Sarcoma and how it afflicts younger people. I've already ordered my copy and you can order yours here (all proceeds go to Ewing's Sarcoma research).

For more on Steven you can read his amazing LiveJournal entries ("Things I've Found in My Butt").

There are also some image and video memorials here and here.

Update: "One Bardstown family turns mourning into celebration" (News Blaze, Oct. 15, 2007)

Previously on Blabbeando:

• Juy 9, 2007: Indie musicians fight Ewing's Sarcoma
  
• June 15, 2007: Steven Mackin would have turned 28 today
• March 7, 2007: The Associated Press profiles Steven Mackin
• February 19, 2007: Steven lives on!
• October 30, 2006: Goodbye, my friend
• October 28, 2006: Word is out so...
• October 26, 2006: Damn, Steven
• October 13, 2006: LJ Bears *heart* Steven Mackin
• September 29, 2006: I *heart* puppies
• September 26, 2006: We love Steven Mackin
• June 20, 2006: Oh no he didn't! Oh yes she did! More bloggers!
  
• April 12, 2006: More fun with Steven
• January 31, 2006: KY = KY jelly or Kentucky?
• November 3, 2005: Time for some good ol' butt

Monica Taher leaves GLAAD

For the casual Blabbeando reader, you might not know just who Mónica Taher is but, trust me, Monica is just one amazing woman. I think we first met when she was editing Tentaciones, a now defunct glossy Latino gay magazine which was based in Los Angeles.

Back then, I can safely say that I was one of the few people monitoring Spanish-language media in the United States for their representation of gay issues so when the Gay and Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation, then under Joan Garry's leadership, reached out to me and shared plans to launch a Spanish-language media component, I was a bit skeptical but excited, and when I found out that Mónica had been hired I was just elated. I truly believe that GLAAD, in some ways, simply lucked out in getting Mónica: The tremendous work she has done over the last five years at the agency has truly had an incredible impact on how Spanish-language media sees the community.

The fact that La Opinion became the first Spanish-language newspaper in the United States to editorialize in favor of same-sex marriage, that both HOY and El Diario La Prensa now publish semi-annual gay pride supplements, that El Gordo of El Gordo y La Flaca now watches what he says about the gays, and that Luis Jimenez of Univision radio was silenced for a couple of months after making offensive remarks about lesbians is all due to Mónica and her staff.

It's really difficult to convey just how much I admire what Mónica did at GLAAD and how much it saddens me to see her go, even as I know we will continue to be life-long friends, and that her move to Azteca TV will open new and much-deserved professional doors for her.

When she shared the news with me a couple of days back, I tried to thank her for all she had done, which sounded a bit awkward since I wanted to convey just how much it has meant to me as a community advocate but when you say it to someone who is a close friend, well, it just sounds funny. So I guess I'll do it publicly through this blog as well. Mónica: You rock! Azteca TV, you just hired one amazing woman. And, GLAAD, you have got some pretty big shoes to fill.

Above, a photo of la Mónica between Pedro Julio Serrano and myself. Below is the statement that Mónica just sent out:

September 21, 2007

Dear Friends,

It is with a great deal of happiness and pride that I share these news with you:

Azteca América, one of the nation’s largest Spanish-language media networks, has tapped me to serve as its Press Relations Director. This position will allow me to grow professionally while overseeing communications strategies for the most important Spanish-language DMAs in the U.S. and will enable me to collaborate on corporate communications for its Mexico City-based sister network, TV Azteca. I will be gravitating between Los Angeles and Mexico City.

I am exhilarated to have the opportunity to become a part of another front to keep pushing for more visibility of LGBT Latina/os. The next 5 to 10 years will be instrumental for the development of Spanish-language media in this country. I want to be in the middle of it. I want to be where the action is.

I thank you for 5 wonderful years of service and the opportunity to help lead a necessary change in Spanish-language media. Thanks to you, we were able to sit down with Univision, Televisa, Telemundo, TV Azteca, Azteca America, Mega TV, Si TV, MTV3s, CNN en Español's executives as well as hundreds of journalists at several newspapers, magazines, radio and online outkets - in order to change the way they discuss our issues.

Thanks to you, we started a much-needed cultural change in the Latina/o community and I thank you from the bottom of my heart.

My last day at GLAAD will be Wednesday, October 3. Should you have any media needs after my departure, please contact Chuy Sanchez at: 646.871.8008 or at sanchez@glaad.org

This is not a good bye, but a "¡Hasta luego!"

Mónica Taher

Colombia Dispatch: Bogota

Bogota is all about....
Sudden downpours in the middle of a sunny day...
Kids in the playground celebrating the Independence Day - July 20th - by channeling their favorite historical figure (so cute)...
Anime grafitti artists who one day might make it to New York City and be utterly disappointed by the blah grafitti work on the walls of the Big Apple (they might do much better if they visit Spain). BTW: What is it with all the young men in Bogota sporting a Speed Racer spiky hairdo?
The hubby walking through a quaint but colorful neighborhood with his mom...
Pesky if somewhat domesticated waterbugs (remember the sudden tropical downpours?)...
The hubby and I posing in front of butterflies that light up with the colors of the Colombian flag...

Colombia Dispatch: Horsing around

Original it is not. I still remember the 2000 ¨CowParade¨ charity event which brought a herd of fiberglass cows - each painted by a different artist - to the streets of New York.

Calling themselves "the world´s largest public art event," the organizers have since set up similar outdoor exhibits throughout the world, auctioning different cows at the end of each exhibit as a fundraiser for different local charities in the host cities.

Enter Equus Arte in Bogota. Walking around the 93rd Street Park in Bogota over the weekend, the hubby and I ran upon several fiberglass horses that had been set up onthe periphery, each with a different design and look, some of them sorta `blah´but some actually quite stunning (the exhibit actually runs through September at various public sites throughout the city and features 74 different horses).

The event, set up by Fundacion Corazon Verde (Green Heart Foundation), seeks to raise money "to improve the quality of life of the widows and orphans of Colombian policemen."

On Thursday, El Tiempo profiled some of the artists, including Maria de la Paz Jaramillo who did "Azul," the blue horse below (next to the hubby). Sorry to say I didn´t take note of the other artists´ names.

Still, in the photo above you can also see how one of the artists took the opportunity to pose the question "Do kidnapped gays have the right to liberty?"

This is an allusion to the outpouring of emotion that erupted earlier this month through the streets of Bogota in reaction to the death of 11 politicians that were being held by the left-wing FARC guerrillas, who had kidnapped them a few months ago.

Tragically, the guerrilla still hold dozens of kidnapped individuals, some whom have been held for a decade or longer, some whom have a lower public profile than the various political leaders that still remain in their hands (including cause celebre Ingrid Betacourt) and some whom were kidnapped when they were very young. Among them a number of small town policemen who, in this country, usually come from the poorest regions and neighborhoods in the country.

The organizers have said that some of the funds raised throug Equus Arte will also go towards helping the families of those kidnapped policemen.

Indie Musicians Fight Ewing's Sarcoma: A Steven Mackin Tribute

The official site will be fully functional on July 11th but Blabbeando has been given a sneak-preview at an online project by The Indie Music Resource Group to raise funds in the fight against Ewing's Sarcoma, a rare form of cancer that usually strikes children and young adults between the ages of 10 and 30.

The project, which would compile the top 20 mixed-genre song submissions for a CD that will be released in October 28th of 2007, is the brain-child of Jake Wheat, Station Manager of Streetblast.com.

The idea, Wheat says, came from his desire to say good-bye to Steven Mackin (pictured), who died of the illness on October 28th of 2006 - something he was not able to do while Steven was alive.

Steven’s loss has saddened and angered me more than I can explain. Steven is owed a distinctive honor. Some good has to come from this sadness. This project is dedicated to Steven Michael Mackin, and this tribute to him will help find a cure, and to also support others cope with Ewing’s Sarcoma. We will stomp out Ewing’s, one way or another

100% of the CD earnings will go towards efforts to find an Ewing's Sarcoma vaccine and improve early detection efforts. Bands are encouraged to submit contributions through the StompOutCancer website beginning July 11th.

For additional information contact Jake Wheat at 502 489-1501 or e-mail at jake@stompoutcancer.com.

Previously on Blabbeando:

• June 15, 2007: Steven Mackin would have turned 28 today
• March 7, 2007: The Associated Press profiles Steven Mackin
• February 19, 2007: Steven lives on!
• October 30, 2006: Goodbye, my friend
• October 28, 2006: Word is out so...
• October 26, 2006: Damn, Steven
• October 13, 2006: LJ Bears *heart* Steven Mackin
• September 29, 2006: I *heart* puppies
• September 26, 2006: We love Steven Mackin
• June 20, 2006: Oh no he didn't! Oh yes she did! More bloggers!
  
• April 12, 2006: More fun with Steven
• January 31, 2006: KY = KY jelly or Kentucky?
• November 3, 2005: Time for some good ol' butt

My New York: The 25th Annual Mermaid Parade

On my birthday a few weeks ago, hubby Raul and William tried to get me to Coney Island on time for the sunset. Instead we ended up stuck in traffic and taking an early exit out in Brooklyn where we had some delicious birthday grub along with my BLFFE (best lesbian friend for-evah) Diana.

With a series of officially announced "impending" renovations at Coney Island's famed amusement parks (home to the world renowned Cyclone roller-coaster and the Wonder-Wheel ferris wheel, above) our fears that it would never be the same took over and we decided to check-out the annual Mermaid Parade on Saturday. And, by golly!, we made it!

It could not have been a better day weatherwise. So, without further ado, the 25th annual Mermaid Parade in images!
The Mermaid Parade is all about... Red (hairy) Lobsters!
The Mermaid Parade is all about... "I wouldn't f*ck you for practice" Pooh Bear bikers...
The Mermaid Parade is all about... Some scary ass rides...
The Mermaid Parade is all about... Cute kids watching the parade go by...
The Mermaid Parade is all about... Ironically and cynically (?) hip topless redneck girls...

There were mermaids too but it would be unoriginal to post pics here, don't you think?

Hm, more pics of everything here. Also, seems I'm not the only one in the gay blogosphere to have made it to the parade for the first time this year?

Breaking News: Guanabee concerned about Folsom key-lime pie misshap

Jeeez! Thanks guys! I assure you I've since learned from it and, most importantly, time has passed and I have healed.

Latino LGBT pride in NYC: 2003

Continuing our look at Latino LGBT organizing in New York through some of the photos I've taken through the years...

copyrighted photo - to post, please ask for permission: blabbeando@gmail.com

Queens pride parade, June 1, 2003: This week's great news that my home country of Colombia is set to become the first Latin American nation to grant some partnership rights to same-sex couples on a national level (other Latin American cities such as Buenos Aires and municipalities had done so before on a local level) came after several attempts to pass such a bill.

In 2003, the Colombian Lesbian and Gay Association (COLEGA) decided to stage a wedding reception and dance in support of a bill that was being sponsored by Colombian Senator Piedad Cordoba at the time. That we did it outdoors and at the Queens pride parade won us the "Simply the Best" award at that year's parade (yay!).

And, yes, before you ask that is the boyfriend (first guy on the left) dancing with another man.

Steven Mackin would have turned 28 today

It's been a few months since Steven died. It hurts big time that he is gone. I often find myself observing something or watching a TV show that I know Steven would have just loved and find myself thinking that it's just impossible that he's not there to share trashy stuff with.

Today he would have turned 28 and a few people have been leaving messages on his MySpace page. I am just glad that I got to know him and, as of late, that I have been able to communicate with his mom and sisters as well.

A bud posted a YouTube video that speaks for all of us (see below). I still cry every time I see it. I am honored that it begins with the image above, which I sent to Steven a few days before he passed away. He just loved it big time.

From his LiveJournal on his birthday last year, before he knew the cancer was back, "My Life in pictures."

I miss you so bub.

Blog roll addition: HotShitRecords

Yes, indeed, it's HotShitRecords and you can find it under my Music Blogs column on the right.
...and, yes, if you note any similarities it's because that's non-other than my brother Juan, editor of HotShitRecords, as he prepares his latest post.

Come July, I'll be visiting him in my home country as I make one of my periodic pilgrimages back to my roots. Looking forward to it big time.

Sadness

So there's a trend afoot among my blog roll listers. Joe.My.God has shared, as of late, his observations about Shelly Winters, while Manhattan Offender recently introduced Sybil. Never mind that my friend Doug keeps trying to guilt trip me into joining the trend (then again his best pal Bugsey has his own MySpace page).

But with the joy of having a little friend at home also come responsibilities as well as much love. And, of course, sometimes life happens which is why we are a bit sad today.

You see, I've known of Benji (pictured) probably as long as I've had Rex as a friend and know exactly just how much he is loved. I guess devil dog Piper showed me more spazzy love the times I visited which made Rex think I was a bit partial to the red menace. But, at the end of the day, how could you not also love Benji in all his Benji-nesness? So we fretted when Benji broke his foot a while back and now feel sad that a recent diagnosis does not bode well for his future.

For now he seems oblivious. Let's hope, as the weeks pass, that he won't suffer much.

Good Times

La Monica was in town this week so we obliged by heading up to Mama Mexico uptown for some groovy Mexican food on Thursday. Yup, that's Pedro Julio as well.

A MEME: The Great Imperative

So, out of the blue, I've been MEME'd (huh?) by Unbeached Whale. Seems that The Great Imperative MEME was originally 'broughten' by Geoffrey Philp which begat Professor Zero which begat Unbeached Whale, which begat, well, you get the point...

So what has been the great imperative in my life? I guess for the longest time it was, to put it in the crassest terms, this, but now that former youthful idealism has been shaped by experience - and as that great imperative now looks a bit trademarked and generic - I've started to realize that the new great imperative is this. Surprisingly, it's something that I have nearly always put second to my work, my lovers, other important relationships and other interests.

So, for the moment, ego rules, baby!

So, what the hell, just for today, I'll tag myself as well.

To the bestest mom in the world...

My mom had a significant birthday last week and it took some adroit arranging to get the party started right and quickly this weekend (as the immortal C&C Music Factory sorta kinda said). Good thing that the right people were there although my brother Juan was surely missed (he lives in Colombia and was not able to take days off work to be here).

The weather was also amazing! So amazing in fact that we saw flying fat wild turkeys; potentially road-kill bunnies, foxes and deer; a squeaking eagle; chimpmunks; tree worms and shooting stars! So all in all an amazing weekend. The mom thought so too and that is, ultimately, what matters (above, the blabbeador, the mom and the other brother, Gabriel).

You like me, you really, really like me!

Thanks Bloggernista!

Good bye, my friend

So, on Saturday, when I wrote about the passing of my good friend, Steven Mackin, I said that there was a last promise to keep.

This actually came up in a conversation we had this summer, long before Steven had begun to experience any stomach discomfort or that any of us knew that his cancer would come back. He made me promise that - if and when he died - I would post my favorite of his photos on this blog because he wanted people to know who he was and feared being forgotten (Forgotten? As if! You should the tremendous outpour of emotions expressed by the many who Steven touched while alive! - read replies here, here, and here).

Of course then, I simply poo-poo'ed the idea and dismissed his mention of the 'd' word. Little did we all know.

Aside from some of Steven's photos that I have used in the past, the above three are absolutely my favorites. His friends, his family and even Steven himself might have chosen other photos but I think the above three speak to who he was without the need for words.

Over at this place, I've set up a memorial album with additional photos, some supplied by close friends as well. There is almost no rhyme and reason to the album and the images are cetrainly not in chronological order but I hope that it conveys some of what we feel towards Steven. Finally, there is also a couple of short videos here.

I may not have been able to attend today's memorial and tomorrow's funeral. But I hope that, in this small way, I can honor the life of such a wonderful person.

Much love to his family and Santino. As for Steven Michael Mackin, I love you and stuff.

Update:

• The viewing? A packed house full of love (thanks for sharing, Wayne)
• Steven M. Mackin (I'd Rather Die in Love, Than Live Forever)
  

Previously:

• Word is out so... (Oct. 28, 2006)
  
• Damn, Steven (Oct. 26, 2006)
  
• LJ bears *heart* Steven Mackin (Oct. 13, 2006)
  
• I *heart* puppies (Sept. 29, 2006)
• We love Steven Mackin (Sept. 26, 2006)
• More fun with Steven (April 12, 2006)
• Time for some good ol' butt (Nov. 3, 2005)

Word is out so...

Earlier this afternoon my cell phone rang and flashed Steven's name. Even before I answered, I pretty much knew that it would be Santino's voice on the other end and the reason he was calling.

Steven had just died at home in Kentucky and Santino wanted to let me know that his family was all gathered around him and that he had died peacefully.

Considering my conversation with Santino last night, I can't say that it was a surprise but it still does not fail to shock me and, on some level, seem too cruel to be true. I mean, I was busting Steven's chops just a couple of weeks back and still hearing him giggle that amazing laugh of his.

Word is out. Someone just posted a reply in his coolukman LiveJournal page with the news. As I've been writing about it for a while now, I thought I'd let readers know as well.

There is just one more promise to keep. One that Steven asked me to do if and when he died. It involves this blog so I will get to it sometime early this week.

Our thoughts are with the Mackin family and with Santino. Santino has been the rock and we send him much love as well. As Steven would say - Good stuff!

Steven M. Mackin. You, my friend, will be so incredibly missed. The few times I wrote about you on this page doesn't even start to approach everything else that we were able to share for a year and a half. You have touched me deeply and will forever continue to be a huge part of my life.

UPDATES:
Friends in San Francisco will be hosting an informal memorial for Steven at the Lonestar Saloon tomorrow Sunday, October 29 at 4PM. For more information go here.

Also, Steven's sisters Amy Joe and Tory have posted the following message on Steven's LiveJournal:

It has been a wild ride! Steven lost his battle with Ewing Sarcoma today at 2:20 pm. He went in the most peaceful way. He went to sleep with a smile on his face. To all of those who love him, we want to share our grief with you. [ALERT: DATES HAVE CHANGED!! I'VE EDITED THE UPDATED INFO AS FOLLOWS] He will be open for visitation on Monday, October 30th in Springfield, Kentucky. His burial will be on Tuesday, October 31st in Bardstown, Kentucky. Prayer service is at 7:00 on Monday night but he will be open for visitation at 10 am. His funeral mass is on Tuesday at 11:00 am. Sorry for the sudden change but we just met with the funeral director. Please call or text all that you know are planning on attending.

My little sister and I were actually reading his Live Journal and laughing when they came to get us for his last moments. We were reading the Christmas 2005 entry...and laughing our asses off.

We have been comforted in these last few days reading your messages to him and the memories you shared. He was well loved. He was an extraordinary person and we were so lucky to walk this journey with him. If you would like to make a donation in his name, he was very interested in the AIDS cause in San Francisco as well as the American Cancer Society research into Ewing Sarcoma. We will personally be donating to Hospice of Nelson County. They made it possible for us to be with him at home for the last week. They made his passing peaceful and pain free..his only dying wish. Our thanks goes out to Lenny Mudd, his nurse. His compassion and outlook on death made Steven's passing a joyful event. His spirit lives on in all of us.

We will keep his cell phone on for the next couple of days if you feel the need to talk about him or to share in our memories. Please continue to share your memories of him...he was mackin' until the day he died!

Amy Jo and Tory

Updates:

• Oct. 11, 2007: A year without Steven
  
• Juy 9, 2007: Indie musicians fight Ewing's Sarcoma
  
• June 15, 2007: Steven Mackin would have turned 28 today
• March 7, 2007: The Associated Press profiles Steven Mackin
• February 19, 2007: Steven lives on!
• Oct. 30, 2006: Good bye, my friend
  

Previously:

• Oct. 26, 2006: Damn, Steven
  
• Oct. 13, 2006: LJ bears *heart* Steven Mackin
  
• Sept. 29, 2006: I *heart* puppies
  
• Sept. 26, 2006: We love Steven Mackin
  
• April 12, 2006: More fun with Steven
  
• Nov. 3, 2005: Time for some good ol' butt
  

We love Steven Mackin

So if you've visited Blabbeando over the past week, you might have noticed the "Photo of the Moment" has featured a hottie with the caption "Mackin on my mind."

If you have been a loyal Blabbeando reader you might also know that we have previously featured Steven Mackin (above) in the past when he daringly questioned P. Diddy's credentials last year and then again this year when he expressed his embarrassment when his mom told him that the sex scenes in "Brokeback Mountan" were kinda "hot."

As some of my friends have commented, we rarely get personal in this blog but today we are making an exception. Turns out that on Saturday I got a call from Steven and I initially thought he was going to tell me about his escapades in Las Vegas, where he'd been spending a few days. So when he first said "It's back" I didn't fully capture what he was saying. "What?" I asked. "I'm in Nashville at the Hospital Center, it's back," he said.

My stomach dropped. You see, back in 2003 Steven (a/k/a coolukman) was diagnosed with a cancerous tumor in tissues surrounding his lower spine for which he had to get surgery and chemo-therapy. Recent check-ups seemed to indicate that he had beaten it but, as of late, Steven had complained about stomach pains. Last week they got so bad upon his return to Kentucky that his family decided to take him to the doctor. The news was that the cancer was back and that he unfortunately had to have another operation as soon as possible.

On Sunday, he told me he was blogging about it. "Are you crazy?!" I said, "You need some privacy! Not to have everyone calling you day or night to know what is going on!"

So why are we writing about it today? Well, Steven reminded me that one of the reasons why he began to write on his LiveJournal blog was to share his experience dealing with cancer so that it might help others in a similar circumstance and that he was not about to back down. As a matter of fact, he made me promise that I would blog about him this week. Hence the "Photo of the Moment" - and this post.

Today, Steven posted his thoughts on the latest developments on his LiveJournal and other friends are keeping up on the latest as well.

Surgery is tentatively scheduled for tomorrow though it's a long-ass 8 to 12 hour stint which might be postponed a day or two. It's tough to provide support from afar but we've tried to make sure that Steven knows that we love him and that we hope for the best possible outcome tomorrow.

Please join me in whishing the Mackin boy the best!

Updates:

• Word is out so... (Oct. 28, 2006)
  
• Damn, Steven (Oct. 26, 2006)
• LJ bears *heart* Steven Mackin (Oct. 13, 2006)
  
• I *heart* puppies (Sept. 29, 2006)
• In a change of plans, no surgery, for now (September 28, 2006)
  

Snowy weekend

Spent the weekend upstate New York with the mom, the brother (the one who is living in the US) and friends. Got my first taste of winter snow (yeepee!!) - Just beautiful.

By the way, that's the boyfriend trying to catch a snowflake in his tongue as he shovels the white stuff out of the driveway.

Oh yeah, the food was great too! (Nothing like my mom's ajiaco soup!)

The Mom

A few posts ago, I blogged about my dad.

Well, now is my mom's turn. Tonight, my partner Raul and I will be attending an exhibit of my mom's paintings at the 2/20 Gallery (220 W 16th Street, Manhattan).

Not for being her son or anything, but I think that my mom is an amazing artist.

Should you want to see her work, please head over to the gallery tonight 'til 9pm or tomorrow and be amazed.

Unfortunately, tomorrow is the last day of the exhibit so if you miss out now you will have to wait until the next exhibit.